Those of you at standing desks right now might want to sit down.
Some of you ARE in fact social media professionals.
I know, it sounds horrible. And there really is no known cure to date. The best remedy right now, is to become Amish. And even that seems to be slipping as a solution.
So you might be asking yourself “This is horrible, how can I tell if I have it?” Well, luckily, there are some clear signals that you might be afflicted.
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These are a few of the warning signs…-
You might work in social media if…
- Your parents keep up with your life through your Twitter feed.
- You are actually using Google+.
- You have sent a DM to someone sitting within 5 feet of you.
- It’s been years since someone mentioned news to you that you hadn’t heard already. - Derek Shanahan
- You verbally hashtag real world conversations.
- You are the mayor of something other than your home. - John Hondroulis
- You judge anyone with a hotmail email address as not so hip.
- You own a t-shirt or jewelry with your Twitter handle on it.
- You look down on anyone that does not own an iPhone.
- You get distracted easi… - Dave Delaney
- You look down on anyone that does not own an android.
- You secretly judge blackberry owners.
- You run into people you have not seen for years and they know everything about your life through Facebook, Twitter and your blog. – Inspired by DJ Waldow
- You secretly judge QR codes that are on subway ads or in airplane magazines. – Inspired by Scott Stratten
- You sign up to social networks before there is any discernible value, just to be an early adopter.
- You have reached the friend limit on Facebook.
- You know that there is a friend limit on Facebook.
- Your mom just tells her friends that you work “on the internet” – Inspired by David Spinks
- You checkin to a restaurant before actually speaking to anyone there.
- You not so secretly judge anyone following more people than are following them on Twitter.
- Your phone is usually face up on the bar or restaurant table when you are out.
- Your couch has Twitter, Facebook, Foursquare or Angry Bird pillows.
- Your world feels like it’s coming to an end when you get a low battery alert on your smartphone - Elysa Rice
- You take photos thinking about how they will look on Facebook.
- You read whatever news you find on Facebook and Twitter.
- You are haunted by the Tweetdeck chirping sound. - Nicole D’Alonzo
- You secretly judge magazine and TV ads that promote their social profiles poorly.
- You secretly hate friends who have more Twitter followers than you.
- You have a backup plan for when Twitter goes down.
- When you have bad customer service, your first step is to find the company’s Twitter handle.
- You complain about how bad Klout is while still signing in to check your score everyday.
- Your smartphone is your best friend.
- You hate when people use the word “viral.”
- You think of @GaryVee every time you see an orange Crush soda.
- You read Mashable more than you read the USA Today.
- You know what a bookmarklet is.
- You have Google alerts setup for your own name.
- You are working on a ‘strategy’ for people to like you. – Ryan Boyles
- You love Twitter.
- You secretly hate Twitter.
- You respect Justin Beiber for his Twitter following and recently learned he plays music too.
- You assume someone is talking about social media instead of pending nuptials when they mention the word “engagement”. – Dave Cutler
- You get bored reading news that is longer than 140 characters.
- All of the parties and events you go to are from Facebook invites.
- Spike Jones has ever made fun of you. – Inspired by Jason Falls
- No one in your family is capable of explaining to their friends what exactly it is that you do. - Mandi Laine
- Your significant other asks, “Are you still working, or just tweeting?” – Ryan Boyles
- You never ask to redeem Foursquare specials because you hate explaining them to your server.
- You think that your friends that are not on Facebook don’t have birthdays.
- Your use Pinterest to write your letter to Santa. – Inspired by Nicole D’Alonzo
- You ask your coworkers and friends for a “big favor” — to help Retweet your latest client’s Twitter campaign.
- You are fully aware that Auto DMs are what is really wrong with America.
- When you completely lose your voice, you use Twitter to ask those sitting with you to “pass the butter, please” #truestory – Lea Marino
- As much as you say you hate the term you secretly hope that someone calls you a “guru” – Simon Salt